Wednesday, March 6, 2013

To prude or not to prude

Ha, yes, I figured I would get around to mentioning this sooner or later. My topic today is BDSM. *gasp* I know, right?

© Iribo | Stock Free Images
So, you're just going to have to excuse my stock photos. Apparently, the free stock images aren't really teeming with images related to BDSM or a similar nature. As far as ropes go, I figured this looked a bit better than the fishing nets I found. :)

Right, so BDSM... Everyone seems to love it lately. Or maybe they have a while, but I've just not paid attention. I'll claim naivety on the subject. But, do people really love it that much?

It seems as though most of the books I see out there recently seem to pop up with some element of the lifestyle in some degree. So does everyone truly love it that much that books involving the subject are flooding the romance market in waves?

© Stanyslava | Stock Free Images
After the take off of 50 Shades, I keep seeing droves of romance novels published with a similar subject. Are there massive amounts of people out there that have the urge to be dominated?

Even though I'm saying all this, I respect that everyone has their own things they love. I'll never put anyone down for their likes/dislikes. I'm mainly writing this post out of curiosity, I suppose.

© Budda | Stock Free Images
Personally, I have no desire to be dominated in the slightest. The first person to pull my hair, even on accident, just might find themselves with a huge lump on their head. Now, as for the spanking of the ass, yeah, well you just might draw back a nub, and I don't mean the good kind poking you in the back in the middle of the night. As for binding and what not, I have to admit it's entirely too nefarious for my tastes. I would probably be inclined to call the good ole boys and girls in blue in that case. In fact, the whole thing's a bit too "Spanish Inquisition-esque", but that's just me - a person with a frightening aversion to coconuts, monkeys and walkers, so there you go.

Variety is good, don't get me wrong, but adding the "pain" aspect to bedsport just isn't a turn on for me. Of course, this is just my personal opinion, and we all have a wide range of opinions. So no offense meant by my statements to anyone should your delights lean towards the BDSM lifestyle. Hey, whatever gets you off, right?

As I said earlier, this post is written mainly out of curiosity. So what do you think of the BDSM fad in romantic fiction lately? Is it a fad at all? Or did I miss something along the way? Do you enjoy BDSM elements in your fiction? I'd love to hear your thoughts on the subject.

24 comments:

  1. Wow, so, erm, uh...have I mentioned that I write YA and NA?? :P I've actually read several BDSM short stories tho...some of them were good and very arousing...some of them were just gross. I think with all things, stuff can be taken too far. One of the books had a guy defecating on his sub (I think that's the term)...anyway, that was too much for me! Ick! I haven't read 50 Shades yet, but I've heard good and bad things. I will read it eventually tho. So your comment about the hair-pulling had me LOLing ;) Thanks for sharing this post!

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    1. Ha, yeah, so glad it was you and not me that read that particular book.

      Glad the hair pulling made you laugh. :) Thanks for stopping by and commenting, chicklette.

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  2. I'm not into BDSM though I've nothing against it. But I prefer any bedroom stuff to be sweet or passionate without any ropes and pain. I think it's probably always been popular, just not shouted so publically until the 50 Shades explosion.

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    1. I have to agree with you. I think it's always been there, but seems to have gotten more public acceptance since 50 Shades. Thanks for dropping by and commenting, Pippa. :) I appreciate it.

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  3. I can't get into BDSM. Can't read it. Nothing. I RT'd your tweet.

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    1. Yeah, it's not really for me either, Ella. Thanks for stopping by and commented. Also for tweeting. I appreciate it. :)

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  4. It's not really for me either - not in my fiction, nor in my real life. I haven't read 50 Shades or any of its offspring and have no plans to (not because of the BDSM but for other, more bitter personal reasons - lol) but I have nothing against it. It just doesn't do a thing for me. In fact, and maybe I'm more of a prude than I thought, but I sometimes feel myself getting embarrassed whenever I read a scene that has elements of it. Besides, really graphic dirty talk is a complete turn-off for me, and from what I've read, BDSM often contains that. None of it is a deal-breaker, and I certainly won't throw an otherwise good book against the wall if a blindfold or a pair of handcuffs pop into the scene, but I certainly don't seek it out.

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    1. I feel the same. It really doesn't do anything for me either, but I know it takes all kinds. :) Yes, I agree. I don't seek it out, but I wouldn't throw it against the wall either. Thanks for stopping by and commenting, Courtney! :)

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  5. BDSM books have been around and popular long before the whole 50 shade phenomenon, I myself enjoy a good BDSM novel,50 shades not so much a GOOD BDSM novel!
    There is something that touches a part of you deep inside the inner cave woman to the cave man I guess that is a turn on with BDSM do I what to be whipped bloody hell no, a little bondage and a handful of hair now and then sign me up :O)

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    1. Ah, see, I knew it, Carin! That's why I claimed naivety on the subject. LOL You totally made me laugh about the whipping. :) Thanks for stopping by and commenting, Carin.

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  6. Hi Melissa,

    Your post made me laugh especially the part about pulling back a nub. I agree, it seems lately everything coming out is in some form or another in the same vein as 50 Shades of Grey. Personally, I can't read BDSM. It's just more than I want to know so the whole Ick factor comes into play for me. But like you said, to each his own.

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    1. Yeah, I guess it's just not for me. But, obviously lots of people out there like. Meh, whatever floats your boat. :) Thanks for commenting, Katherine.

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  7. Honestly, I call it the Fifty Shades Hangover! I read good BDSM and Fifty is not good BDSM. Its trash and I don't understand the popularity of it.

    What's worse are the writers that think they can write BDSM and basically all they have done is watch porn.

    I could go on but I don't want to bore your readers. :)

    Marika/Harlie

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    1. Fifty Shades Hangover..ha, that's good, Marika. :) I suppose I don't know enough about to know what would be good and what would be bad. Hmm.

      Thank you for dropping by and commenting. :)

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  8. I'm not into the BDSM scene either. Not interested in reading or writing it. Don't want it in my personal life. A playful spank is one thing...whips, chains, and gag-balls are another. Loved your post today. I giggled through to the end.

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    1. Haha, thanks for stopping by, Sheri. And I'm with you. I'm not into any of that stuff either. I know they say it takes trust, and I'll be the first to admit I just don't have it.

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  9. I'm not into BDSM. Spanking reminds me too much of a parent disciplining a child. As for tying up, too scary.
    I'm not one for pain with sex.

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    1. Thanks for dropping by, Brenda! Yeah, me either. I associate pleasure with sex. Unfortunately, none of the BDSM stuff will ever be pleasurable for me. But more power to the people that find a passion for it.

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  10. I'm like everyone else. I've stumbled across BDSM in a book or two and read it, but I don't go searching it out. BDSM usually pushes me to the edges of my comfort zone and if pushed too far, can pull me out of the story.

    Good post!

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    1. That's a good way to put it, Stacey. It does push my comfort zone as well. I suppose it's a bit like infidelity and menage in romances. I don't really care for those either. But, as I've already said, I know we each have our likes and dislikes. So whatever works, I guess. :) Thanks for dropping by and commenting.

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  11. I wrote bit of BDSM - before 50 Shades - but in my last book there was only a teeny tiny scene and the character pretty much had your point of view- she wasn't interested. I think I am done investigating this area in my erotic writing - a) because I don;t want to and b) as you say - everyone else is doing it. Which is funny - in my fist book there is a scene where the characters go into a dungeon and not much happens - but I got "spanked" by reviews for it. Now, the scene wouldn't even be noticed.

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  12. Wow, that's funny it happened that way. How weird. It's odd how perceptions have changed a bit. Thanks for commenting, Daryl. :)

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  13. I enjoy bdsm but I like mine on the easy side not the hardcore. But I like to read all kinds of books and I'd say bdsm makes up about 1/8 of my collection. I really love my historicals and Scottish books.
    z

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    1. Thanks for stopping by and commenting, Z. :) Perhaps, I just haven't read the right kinds of BDSM. Who knows? I do love historicals and Scottish books too though. :)

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